Why is Marco Rubio cockblocking Miami’s Roy Altman for US Attorney job?


Attorney General Jeff Sessions fired 46 Obama-era Justice Department attorneys in March and as of today, there are still 93 vacancies to be filled over there. And while those gaping holes remain, the scuttlebutt sizzles down in Miami as rumors fly as to who may or may not be chosen to rep the Southern District of Florida. In April, we told you about a Jeb! loving attorney, John Curiel, who was on the almost definite outs because he was a Never Trumper, and a season 5 Apprentice contestant, Jose Felix Diaz, who flat out bombed the DOJ interview. Not so ironically, those two were seen flanking Trump when he flew down to Miami to announce what the New York Times called a “grotesque spectacle” of a Cuba policy.

Emerging as a competent frontrunner for the position, if Sessions (or whoever replaces him when he’s indicted for perjury) ever fills it, is Roy Altman, a trial and appellate lawyer at Miami-based Podhurst Orsek, whose impressive CV  reads like someone who should definitely be hired for the job: “Prior to joining the firm, Roy was an Assistant United States Attorney for the Southern District of Florida. During his over six years at the U.S. Attorney’s Office, Roy handled hundreds of criminal cases involving almost every variety of federal criminal offense, including drug trafficking (both domestic and international); arms trafficking; human trafficking; sex trafficking; child prostitution, exploitation, and pornography; bank, mail, and wire fraud; identity theft; armed robbery; attempted murder; serial rape; and the first-degree murder of a U.S. postal worker.”

Sounds like a shoe-in, right? Not if Marco Rubio has anything to do with it. In between tweeting out Bible passages and burying his nose in Trump’s rectum, Lil’ Marco has been going around town telling people he is going to ‘blue slip’ Altman’s nomination if it gets to that point. Why? According to our well-placed source, Rubio has been heard saying, “If Altman was as good as everyone said he was, I would have heard of him before.”

Marco, have you lost your mind along with your spine and testicles? Listed at the very top of the names for Miami Dade members of Rubio’s “Jewish Leadership Coalition, a group of 150 Republican, Democrat and Independent leaders of the Jewish community who are rallying behind Marco in his bid for re-election,” on his Rubio for Senate website is, yup, wait for it, Roy Altman.

So what gives? “Altman’s name was good enough to float on Rubio’s website to pander to the Jews when he was running,” says our very deep throat, who adds, “and now, all of a sudden, he doesn’t know who he is?”

His mind must be in the same place as his missing spine and balls.


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